Why do I put myself through this pain? I can’t help it; I still feel embarrassed about my home situation/life in general. I’m too old to be at home, not that I want to be. But I’m such a loser I can’t afford to move out. I don’t want her knowing these things about me. But as far as I can see it is only sex so why am I so uptight about it?
Well, as always, the sex itself makes me nervous. I’m still keen to suck and lick tits, but anything else? Kissing I’m sure is fine. A nice wet, warm mouth, is a nice wet warm mouth. (Do boobs get in the way when it’s girl on girl? Hee hee, just being silly). Okay I am a little nervous about oral. I’m sure I COULD do it but just that first time has got me scared. I can’t remember what I thought the first time I sucked a cock but I don’t think I hesitated. It seemed so natural and easy. (When I was little my dad was always telling me to stop putting things in my mouth, now I know why. It’s dirty; yes it is!)
I sent skully another offline. Not inviting us to do anything, just asking how her search for a woman is going, whilst wondering if she’d tell me about it when she’s accomplished it. I’m sure she will find someone. Not that I have anything to base that on. No reply so far but that’s probably good. I sent her a good luck/goodbye one this morning.
Looks like I'll have to stick to reading about girls being together rather than trying it for myself. That's a weird book in the photo. It's edited to just have the sex scenes. I'm getting another one soon called Wet: True Lesbian Sex Stories edited by the same woman. It could be interesting. Bit of a how-to guide if I ever get that far.